英語(yǔ)笑話小短文帶翻譯

　　1、Good Boy

　　Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. “What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?”

　　“I gave it to a poor old woman,” he answered.

　　“You’re a good boy,” said the mother proudly. “Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?”

　　“She is the one who sells the candy.”

　　好孩子

　　小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。

　　“昨天給你的錢干什么了?”

　　“我給了一個(gè)可憐的老太婆，”他回答說。 “你真是個(gè)好孩子，”媽媽驕傲地說。“再給你兩分錢�？赡銥槭裁磳�(duì)那位老太太那么感興趣呢?”

　　“她是個(gè)賣糖果的。”

　　2、Nest and Hair

　　My sister, a primary school teacher, was informed by one of her pupils that a bird had built its nest in the tree outside the classroom.

　　“What kind of bird?” my sister asked.

　　“I didn’t see the bird, ma’ am, only the nest,” replied the child.

　　“Then, can you give us a description of the nest?” my sister encouraged her .

　　“Well, ma’am, it just resembles your hair. ”

　　Notes:

　　(1) inform v.告訴

　　(2) nest n.窩;巢

　　(3) description n.描述

　　(4) encourage v.鼓勵(lì)

　　(5) resemble v. 相似;類似

　　鳥窩與頭發(fā)

　　我姐姐是一位小學(xué)老師。一次一個(gè)學(xué)生告訴她說一只鳥兒在教室外 的樹上壘了個(gè)窩。

　　“是什么鳥呢?”我姐姐問她。

　　“我沒看到鳥兒，老師，只看到鳥窩。”那孩子回答說。

　　“那么，你能給我們描述一下這個(gè)鳥巢嗎?”我姐姐鼓勵(lì)她道。

　　“哦，老師，就像你的頭發(fā)一樣。”

　　3、A Woman Who Fell

　　It was rush hour and I was dashing to a train in New York City’s Grand Central Terminal – As I neared the gate, a plump, middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind, lost her footing on the smooth marble floor and slid onto her back. Her momentum carried her close to my shoes. Before I could help her, however, she had scrambled up. Gaining her composure, she winked at me and said, “Do you always have beautiful women failing at your feet?”

　　摔倒的女人

　　上下班高峰期，我匆匆奔向紐約豪華中心站去趕一趟火車。接近門口，一位肥胖的中年婦女從后面沖過來，沒想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了腳，仰面滑倒了。她的慣性使她接近了我的`腳。我正準(zhǔn)備扶她，她卻自己爬了起來。她鎮(zhèn)定了一下，對(duì)我擠了一下眉，說道：“總是有漂亮女人拜倒在你腳下嗎?”

　　4、The mean man’s party.

　　The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, “Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot.”

　　“Why use my elbow and foot?”

　　“Well, gosh,” was the reply, “You’re not coming empty-hangded, are you?”

　　吝嗇鬼請(qǐng)客

　　一個(gè)出了名的吝嗇鬼終于決定要請(qǐng)一次客了。他在向一個(gè)朋友解釋怎么找到他家時(shí)說：“你上到五樓，找中間那個(gè)門，然后用你的胳膊肘按門鈴。門開了之后，再用你的腳把門推開。”

　　“為什么要用我的肘和腳呢?”

　　“你的雙手得拿禮物啊。天哪，你總不會(huì)空著手來吧?”吝嗇鬼回答。

　　5、Cat and Mice

　　Mrs Brown went to visit one of her friend and carried a small box with holes punched in the top.

　　" What's in your box?" asked the friend.

　　"A cat," answered Mrs Brown. "You see I've been dreaming about mice at night and I'm so scared! This cat is to catch them."

　　"But the mice are only imaginary," said the friend.

　　"So is the cat," whispered Mrs Brown.

　　貓和老鼠

　　布朗夫人去拜訪一位朋友，她拿著一個(gè)頂部扎滿了小眼兒的盒子。“盒子里裝的是什么?”朋友問道。“一只小貓，”布朗夫人回答說，“你知道我晚上睡覺總夢(mèng)見老鼠，我非常害怕。這只貓可以抓住那些老鼠。”“可老鼠都是假想的呀。”朋友說。“小貓也是假想的。”布朗夫人小聲說道。